SIMPLY YOU Magazine for Teens & Young Adults
"If you nurture your mind, body, and spirit, your time will expand. You will gain a new perspective that will allow you to accomplish much more." --Brian Koslow
Body. Mind. Spirit
| Bohn Web Design Copyright © 1999 to Present. All rights reserved. | Technical Assistance: Lynne@BohnWebDesign.com |
Thoughts Love starts with a smile, grows with a kiss, and ends with a tear. Don't cry over anyone who won't cry over you. If love isn't a game, why are there so many players? Good friends are hard to find, harder to leave, and impossible to forget. You can only go as far as you push. Actions speak louder than words. The hardest thing to do is watch the one you love, love somebody else. Don't let the past hold you back, you're missing the good stuff. Life's short. If you don't look around once in a while you might miss it. A best friend is like a four leaf clover, hard to find and lucky to have. Some people make the world special just by being in it. Best friends are the siblings God forgot to give us. When it hurts to look back, and you're scared to look ahead, you can look beside you and your best friend will be there. Good friends are like stars....You don't always see them, but you know they are always there. Don't frown. You never know who is falling in love with your smile. What do you do when the only person who can make you stop crying is the person who made you cry? Nobody is perfect until you fall in love with them. Everything is okay in the end. If it's not okay, then it's not the end. Most people walk in and out of your life, but only friends leave footprints in your heart. Remember, every minute spent angry is sixty seconds of happiness wasted. The Question My parents want me to major in accounting, because they feel it will provide me with financial security later in life, but I am totally not interested in that field. This is my senior year of high school, and they are piling on the stress about my career choice. Do I have to make a choice now? Should I follow their advice? I need some advice ASAP!* Hold up...Don't stress. There are two sides to every story. Let's look at it from your parents' point of view first: They are worried about you. They only want the best for you in all matters of life, including financially. So they nag and they tell you what to do, even when you don't want to hear it, and it all gets a little confusing; right? Well, that's how it is for a lot of young adults. Often times our parents try to control us now and into our futures. Our parents see that their "baby" is growing up, beginning to make his/her own choices, and it scares them a little. They feel they know what is best for you, and they will continue to steer you in that direction no matter how much you persist. From your point of view: You just want to do what you are interested in, you don't know why they won't let you alone so you can enjoy senior year and worry about all of life's choices LATER. Right now you want to have fun, hang with your friends, and even spend some time on homework.--But you don't want to stress about whether you will take chemistry or biology your freshman year of college, let alone what you will major in. But your major is a big deal, and that choice could affect the rest of your life. So, to answer your question, NO, you do not need to make a choice right NOW. However, make sure to give it some thought. I have found out from experience that it is better to plan your college years a little in advance. That way you will get done in 4 years instead of being on the 5+ year plan that some get sucked into due to poor advising and/or planning. Look at different books to determine what careers you may be interested in. Visit your school counselor. Ask your counselor if there are any tests you can take to determine your interests. There are many tests available that can match your interests with a career that would be suitable for you. Talk to people already in the business, as well, to get a feel for what it's all about. Often what you study in a book is way different than what you actually do on the job. Secondly, don't sell out. If you aren't interested in accounting, don't do it. Maybe you could take an introductory accounting class to appease your parents. Maybe you will find it actually does interest you. Just dabble in it a little. That will please your parents and let you know whether or not you have an interest in accounting. If you find you are not at all interested after that course, quick, go find another major to pursue. You don't want to waste time on a major you are not interested in, but you also do not want to waste time skipping from major to major or being "undeclared" for too long. Just have a peaceful discussion with your parents about it. If you show them that you are truly interested in finding that perfect career for your future growth, I'm sure they will begin to calm down. Just remember that their words are said with love and concern. The Question: I have a problem. I'm in the 8th grade and I've never ever been on a date, which means I have never had a boyfriend. The problem is that when I am asked out I don't know how to tell my parents. You are right....Parents will often freak out when they realize their little girl is growing up and ready to date. Then again, they were young once, too, and they can empathize with your need to socialize. A great suggestion would be to discuss the idea of a boyfriend with your parents and then to take things slow, either way. Tell them you just want to go out and have fun; you really don't want anything too serious right now anyway; do you? Most middle school and even high school relationships don't last long term, but they are fun while they last. Getting to know different people out of a classroom setting will broaden your horizons and prepare you for future relationships. If your parents still aren't too keen on the idea of you dating just yet, "You can't have a boyfriend til you are 16...or 40!" may have spewed from their mouths when you first mentioned it to them. They may feel you are still too young. To prove them somewhat wrong, don't just tell your parents that you are mature and ready to date, show them through your actions. Then you can cite examples of different situations that you have handled in a mature manner; they will begin to notice. Just remember that not everyone in 8th grade has a boyfriend, even though it may seem like it. Your time will come soon enough, trust me. One more thing, you might want to mention the reason for your apprehension of dating to these boys. They might think you don't like them at all, when it is really your parents who are holding you back. Explain it in a cool way, "You know how parents can be, so protective," and they should understand....And hopefully then they will keep you in mind for future dating opportunities, when your parents finally do allow you to date. Good luck! The Question: I have noticed this guy checking me out whenever I am at our local hang out. He seems very shy, but he is always looking at me when I am dancing and socializing...not in a creepy way, but in an "I like what I see" sort of way. So, I decided to go have a chat with him and introduce myself. We shook hands and talked for a few brief minutes. He seemed receptive, but as the conversation faded for a few seconds, he took off! Now, what is with that? Ty's Answer: You, yourself, say he is a very shy guy. Right there that puts him at a disadvantage, especially when approached by you, who seems to be a very confident girl. It's great that you are so self-assured and confident, but the poor guy was probably intimidated. There are many things that he could be thinking, (such as "Freak Girl, get away from me!" or "How does this girl know my name?" or "Do I have something stuck between my teeth?"), but he was probably totally impressed that you came over to chat yet way shy about it. I think a million things were running through his mind as he was overwhelmed and unprepared. He probably didn't know what to say to someone he has been gazing at from afar for the past year. Maybe he was even a bit embarrassed, thinking that you must have caught him looking at you (to prompt you to come over and talk). I say to give him a chance. I bet the next time you see him out he will have more than a few words to say. He's probably practicing in the mirror right now! Make sure that you have at least one conversation starter for him when you next bump into each other, as well. I think that good things will come of this. Good for you for taking charge and getting to know him! Someone had to have the "balls" to do it; right? The Question: My "boyfriend" is 17 and I'm only 13. He's always saying how much he likes me, but I'm getting tired of him. Now I don't even like him anymore and he's begging for me back! Plus, we used to fool around and it got to where I hated to see him because I knew what he would expect from me. What should I do? Am I being rude by saying get off me?? In response to your question, you are not being rude. Telling your boyfriend, or anyone, how you feel is very important. You have rights just like anyone else. And if you choose not to do certain things with him, he must respect that. At thirteen, there are more important things to be concerned about than fending off someone or something you do not want. Tell him where you stand on the issue. If he truly cares about you, he will respect you. He will not force you to do anything that you do not want to do. He will not pressure you in any way. If you are truly tired of him, your body and mind is obviously telling you your answer. You might want to keep away from him and save yourself for someone more special. Respect yourself and the right guy will find you. We hope that helped. ~SYM The Question: My girlfriend recently cheated on me with another guy in my grade. She told me about it when she dumped me. For some reason, I feel like it is all my fault. What is wrong with me? What did I do wrong? I really cared about her. To answer your question, you did nothing wrong. Your girlfriend cheating on you was a reflection upon her and not upon yourself. Not only was she being dishonest to you, but also to herself. You did not have control over her actions. There was nothing that you could have done to stop her from cheating on you. It is best to realize that you learned a lot from the experience and move on to a girl that will treat you better. We hope that helped. ~SYM
Thoughts Love starts with a smile, grows with a kiss, and ends with a tear. Don't cry over anyone who won't cry over you. If love isn't a game, why are there so many players? Good friends are hard to find, harder to leave, and impossible to forget. You can only go as far as you push. Actions speak louder than words. The hardest thing to do is watch the one you love, love somebody else. Don't let the past hold you back, you're missing the good stuff. Life's short. If you don't look around once in a while you might miss it. A best friend is like a four leaf clover, hard to find and lucky to have. Some people make the world special just by being in it. Best friends are the siblings God forgot to give us. When it hurts to look back, and you're scared to look ahead, you can look beside you and your best friend will be there. Good friends are like stars....You don't always see them, but you know they are always there. Don't frown. You never know who is falling in love with your smile. What do you do when the only person who can make you stop crying is the person who made you cry? Nobody is perfect until you fall in love with them. Everything is okay in the end. If it's not okay, then it's not the end. Most people walk in and out of your life, but only friends leave footprints in your heart. Remember, every minute spent angry is sixty seconds of happiness wasted. The Question My parents want me to major in accounting, because they feel it will provide me with financial security later in life, but I am totally not interested in that field. This is my senior year of high school, and they are piling on the stress about my career choice. Do I have to make a choice now? Should I follow their advice? I need some advice ASAP!* Hold up...Don't stress. There are two sides to every story. Let's look at it from your parents' point of view first: They are worried about you. They only want the best for you in all matters of life, including financially. So they nag and they tell you what to do, even when you don't want to hear it, and it all gets a little confusing; right? Well, that's how it is for a lot of young adults. Often times our parents try to control us now and into our futures. Our parents see that their "baby" is growing up, beginning to make his/her own choices, and it scares them a little. They feel they know what is best for you, and they will continue to steer you in that direction no matter how much you persist. From your point of view: You just want to do what you are interested in, you don't know why they won't let you alone so you can enjoy senior year and worry about all of life's choices LATER. Right now you want to have fun, hang with your friends, and even spend some time on homework.--But you don't want to stress about whether you will take chemistry or biology your freshman year of college, let alone what you will major in. But your major is a big deal, and that choice could affect the rest of your life. So, to answer your question, NO, you do not need to make a choice right NOW. However, make sure to give it some thought. I have found out from experience that it is better to plan your college years a little in advance. That way you will get done in 4 years instead of being on the 5+ year plan that some get sucked into due to poor advising and/or planning. Look at different books to determine what careers you may be interested in. Visit your school counselor. Ask your counselor if there are any tests you can take to determine your interests. There are many tests available that can match your interests with a career that would be suitable for you. Talk to people already in the business, as well, to get a feel for what it's all about. Often what you study in a book is way different than what you actually do on the job. Secondly, don't sell out. If you aren't interested in accounting, don't do it. Maybe you could take an introductory accounting class to appease your parents. Maybe you will find it actually does interest you. Just dabble in it a little. That will please your parents and let you know whether or not you have an interest in accounting. If you find you are not at all interested after that course, quick, go find another major to pursue. You don't want to waste time on a major you are not interested in, but you also do not want to waste time skipping from major to major or being "undeclared" for too long. Just have a peaceful discussion with your parents about it. If you show them that you are truly interested in finding that perfect career for your future growth, I'm sure they will begin to calm down. Just remember that their words are said with love and concern. The Question: I have a problem. I'm in the 8th grade and I've never ever been on a date, which means I have never had a boyfriend. The problem is that when I am asked out I don't know how to tell my parents. You are right....Parents will often freak out when they realize their little girl is growing up and ready to date. Then again, they were young once, too, and they can empathize with your need to socialize. A great suggestion would be to discuss the idea of a boyfriend with your parents and then to take things slow, either way. Tell them you just want to go out and have fun; you really don't want anything too serious right now anyway; do you? Most middle school and even high school relationships don't last long term, but they are fun while they last. Getting to know different people out of a classroom setting will broaden your horizons and prepare you for future relationships. If your parents still aren't too keen on the idea of you dating just yet, "You can't have a boyfriend til you are 16...or 40!" may have spewed from their mouths when you first mentioned it to them. They may feel you are still too young. To prove them somewhat wrong, don't just tell your parents that you are mature and ready to date, show them through your actions. Then you can cite examples of different situations that you have handled in a mature manner; they will begin to notice. Just remember that not everyone in 8th grade has a boyfriend, even though it may seem like it. Your time will come soon enough, trust me. One more thing, you might want to mention the reason for your apprehension of dating to these boys. They might think you don't like them at all, when it is really your parents who are holding you back. Explain it in a cool way, "You know how parents can be, so protective," and they should understand....And hopefully then they will keep you in mind for future dating opportunities, when your parents finally do allow you to date. Good luck! The Question: I have noticed this guy checking me out whenever I am at our local hang out. He seems very shy, but he is always looking at me when I am dancing and socializing...not in a creepy way, but in an "I like what I see" sort of way. So, I decided to go have a chat with him and introduce myself. We shook hands and talked for a few brief minutes. He seemed receptive, but as the conversation faded for a few seconds, he took off! Now, what is with that? Ty's Answer: You, yourself, say he is a very shy guy. Right there that puts him at a disadvantage, especially when approached by you, who seems to be a very confident girl. It's great that you are so self-assured and confident, but the poor guy was probably intimidated. There are many things that he could be thinking, (such as "Freak Girl, get away from me!" or "How does this girl know my name?" or "Do I have something stuck between my teeth?"), but he was probably totally impressed that you came over to chat yet way shy about it. I think a million things were running through his mind as he was overwhelmed and unprepared. He probably didn't know what to say to someone he has been gazing at from afar for the past year. Maybe he was even a bit embarrassed, thinking that you must have caught him looking at you (to prompt you to come over and talk). I say to give him a chance. I bet the next time you see him out he will have more than a few words to say. He's probably practicing in the mirror right now! Make sure that you have at least one conversation starter for him when you next bump into each other, as well. I think that good things will come of this. Good for you for taking charge and getting to know him! Someone had to have the "balls" to do it; right? The Question: My "boyfriend" is 17 and I'm only 13. He's always saying how much he likes me, but I'm getting tired of him. Now I don't even like him anymore and he's begging for me back! Plus, we used to fool around and it got to where I hated to see him because I knew what he would expect from me. What should I do? Am I being rude by saying get off me?? In response to your question, you are not being rude. Telling your boyfriend, or anyone, how you feel is very important. You have rights just like anyone else. And if you choose not to do certain things with him, he must respect that. At thirteen, there are more important things to be concerned about than fending off someone or something you do not want. Tell him where you stand on the issue. If he truly cares about you, he will respect you. He will not force you to do anything that you do not want to do. He will not pressure you in any way. If you are truly tired of him, your body and mind is obviously telling you your answer. You might want to keep away from him and save yourself for someone more special. Respect yourself and the right guy will find you. We hope that helped. ~SYM The Question: My girlfriend recently cheated on me with another guy in my grade. She told me about it when she dumped me. For some reason, I feel like it is all my fault. What is wrong with me? What did I do wrong? I really cared about her. To answer your question, you did nothing wrong. Your girlfriend cheating on you was a reflection upon her and not upon yourself. Not only was she being dishonest to you, but also to herself. You did not have control over her actions. There was nothing that you could have done to stop her from cheating on you. It is best to realize that you learned a lot from the experience and move on to a girl that will treat you better. We hope that helped. ~SYM
SIMPLY YOU Magazine for Teens & Young Adults
"If you nurture your mind, body, and spirit, your time will expand. You will gain a new perspective that will allow you to accomplish much more." --Brian Koslow
Body. Mind. Spirit
| Bohn Web Design Copyright © 1999 to Present. All rights reserved. | | Technical Assistance: Lynne@BohnWebDesign.com |